Be the Daughter-In-Law that Your Mother-In-Law Always Wanted to Have

February 26, 2010 by Patricia  
Filed under Married Life

Most women who are able to maintain good relationships with their mother-in-laws are considered extremely lucky these days. Apparently, this is not the same circumstance shared by many and majority of the married lot have gone on and lived to tell their sorry tales. It’s no wonder, mother-in-law jokes and anecdotes abound, some eerily true, others endearingly funny and most grossly spurious. One can’t help but think that some of these may have been intentionally concocted to send tiny shivers of apprehensions down the spines of nervous brides. Nevertheless, these stories have become good starting points for getting relevant advice on relationship when dealing with your mother-in-law, in particular – the other woman in your husband’s life.

According to Dr. Laura Schlessinger, military mom and a family counselor, there are four important things to remember when dealing with your mother-in-law: Understand, Empathize, Communicate and Plan. Like your marriage, your relationship with your mother-in-law also requires constant work. It’s not as if you expect to gain a lifetime fan the very minute you say “I Do”, right? So the most important advice on relationship from Schlessinger is commitment to making your marriage work and taking on extended family members.

Understand that your friend’s success or woes about her relationship with her mother-in-law has its own unique challenges, so don’t make comparisons. If this is the case, you are on your way to developing a bad case of nerves, stressing yourself out with senseless anxieties. Take time to empathize with your mother-in-law’s point of view. It can be difficult for mothers to totally let go of their sons and relinquish him to another female species. Give her time to adjust and by all means do no hesitate to reach out and offer subtle gestures to warmth and affection.
According to Schlessinger, it is also a good idea to communicate with your mother-in-law, most especially if your husband is away. You can provide her regular updates on her son’s well-being. This is a simple gesture that she will greatly appreciate. Remember, while you are married to the man, she is first and foremost the parent, so never undermine that role.
Lastly, make plans for reunions and family parties. There is no better way to make sure she does not feel excluded and left out in the family by regularly invitingly her during special occasions. Schlessinger’s advice on relationship is actually quite simple and yet, effectively helps forge a stronger bond between young wives and their mother-in-laws.

No TagsNo Tags

Popularity: 1% [?]

StumbleUpon It!

Leave a Reply